Friends, Family, & a Freak out
Life! I seem to be constantly on the verge of craziness or tears these days. Yesterday I drove back to RF to get away from my life. It was a nice distraction, but things there were getting on my nerves... like Dad's constant hovering, and the way that Katie once again disappeared with AJ as soon as I got there.
I generally feel bad and guilty for dumping my issues on other people. I know I've written about this before. I didn't want to bring anything up at home... the only person I'd talk to there would be Mom, but she seemed pretty tired and stressed herself.
I left there today still feeling upset and crazy and alone... and mad because all of these feelings are my own fault.
Drove home... in the sticky rain/snow shit, trying to avoid semi's, music blaring, mentally going through my list of phone numbers, trying to find one I felt comfortable enough to call... I'd go through them one by one, thinking about each one until I found a reason why I *couldn't* call it. I am ridiculous.
I get home, unpack, realize I left my glasses at my parents' house... call my mom to see when we can meet so I can get them, and have a slight breakdown on the phone. She decides she's going to come and drop the glasses off tonight. I tell her she doesn't have to, that it's snow/raining, but she insists.
Okay.
I turn on the computer to see what I have missed in the past day and a half of no internet (not much). I did have a good conversation about drugs (among other things) on AIM... funny stuff. Helped me destress a bit.
Mom came over, insisted that we wash the pile of dishes in the sink... this gave us a good opportunity to have a real talk. It was so nice of her to drive over here - when she could only stay for an hour - just to make sure I was okay (when she'd already seen me for half the weekend)! I'm really lucky to have her around. I need to remember that it's okay to open up.
I generally feel bad and guilty for dumping my issues on other people. I know I've written about this before. I didn't want to bring anything up at home... the only person I'd talk to there would be Mom, but she seemed pretty tired and stressed herself.
I left there today still feeling upset and crazy and alone... and mad because all of these feelings are my own fault.
Drove home... in the sticky rain/snow shit, trying to avoid semi's, music blaring, mentally going through my list of phone numbers, trying to find one I felt comfortable enough to call... I'd go through them one by one, thinking about each one until I found a reason why I *couldn't* call it. I am ridiculous.
I get home, unpack, realize I left my glasses at my parents' house... call my mom to see when we can meet so I can get them, and have a slight breakdown on the phone. She decides she's going to come and drop the glasses off tonight. I tell her she doesn't have to, that it's snow/raining, but she insists.
Okay.
I turn on the computer to see what I have missed in the past day and a half of no internet (not much). I did have a good conversation about drugs (among other things) on AIM... funny stuff. Helped me destress a bit.
Mom came over, insisted that we wash the pile of dishes in the sink... this gave us a good opportunity to have a real talk. It was so nice of her to drive over here - when she could only stay for an hour - just to make sure I was okay (when she'd already seen me for half the weekend)! I'm really lucky to have her around. I need to remember that it's okay to open up.
posted by Laura at
11:33 PM
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